Many individuals seek counseling and psychotherapy with the goal of "change," but the true meaning of this desire can be complex. How many times do I hear the question: “How can I transform my life?” Western philosophical and scientific approaches to psychotherapy often view mental and emotional distress as a collection of symptoms to be permanently altered. Yet, how can one truly achieve lasting change when the very essence of life is continuous transformation? From an Eastern perspective, life itself is in a constant state of flux, making the concept of enduring change a contradiction in terms. Buddhist teachings remind us that transformation is sustained by mindfulness practices, self-acceptance, and daily intentions that reconnect us to our authentic selves.
Often, the pull of comfort is stronger than the call to change. Jack Kornfield prompts us to consider, "What then initiates a conscious shift or change in our lives?" Here are some of his ideas.
- Deep love has the power to transform us. When we open our hearts fully to a child, to nature, or to another person, we cultivate forgiveness, flexibility, and a deep sense of care and sacrifice. This profound connection allows us to go beyond our limited self-perception and expand our capacities. Through such love, our very sense of self becomes more expansive.
- Change sometimes arises from pain and suffering. As we face our old ways of living, a profound sickness can take hold. The burden of addiction, fear, attachment, dependence, and selfishness becomes unbearable; we feel it, and we seek change because we simply cannot continue. Once we recognize this, we are unable to repeat old patterns. We begin to sense the prison we have constructed for ourselves, and we can no longer stay locked inside.
- When we confront life's darkness or fear, we discover our inner strength. Transformation happens as we face what we typically avoid—like the pain of loss, illness, or separation. By embracing these challenges and allowing ourselves to fully experience them, our hearts grow.
- We can draw inspiration from everything that surrounds us.This might come from listening to music, hiking in the mountains, observing the ocean, or looking into a child's eyes. At times, a teacher or benefactor can appear and open our eyes to new possibilities.
How do we find inspiration? In each of these instances, inspiration strikes and then fades. The crucial inquiry becomes: what sustains transformation?
Recognizing the transformation within our own bodies is crucial to ensuring mental health. We must keep these patterns of change alive by allowing ourselves to experience them physically. For instance, notice how it feels inside when you hold onto resentment or hatred. Healing meditation promotes a bodily transformation, leading to physical change. By learning to feel our lives through our physical bodies, we maintain awareness, which is vital for our true awakening and change of negative emotional and psychological states.
True transformation comes from self-acceptance. Self-compassion is key. Practicing self-compassion and embracing who you are, precisely as you are, creates the fertile ground from which genuine change can naturally emerge. This acceptance extends to all things, allowing us to acknowledge and honor the reality of what simply is.
By intentionally and repeatedly engaging with our inner selves, we cultivate a heightened state of awareness. This practice has the power to gradually transform the fundamental patterns of our existence. This happens in psychotherapy, but also in regular meditation practice.
Change is achieved by setting a daily intention to change. We consistently engage with life through awareness and consciously set intentions to change.
True change isn't about achieving perfection, but rather a profound shift in our being—a return to our authentic selves where we have access to the things that initiate change and sustain transformation.
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In 2025 Kimberly completed a 2-year Mindfulness Meditation Teachers Training Program (MMTPC) presented by The Awareness Training Institute and in collaboration with
Greater Good Science Center, University of California, Berkeley. Co-led by
Jack Kornfield and
Tara Brach, the immersive 2-year training experience provided a broad range of learning experiences delivered by highly skilled mindfulness experts, leaders, and social activists from around the world.
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